When Chaz Bono announced publicly in 2009 that he was transitioning, he became a trailblazer for trans actors in Hollywood.
The actor, whose roles in American Horror Story: Roanoke and American Horror Story: Cult have earned him cult status, recently sat down with Demi Lovato on their podcast, 4D with Demi Lovato, where he spoke about how his journey toward sobriety and his journey toward discovering his gender identity are intimately connected.
“Having lived it, I don’t think of myself as that brave,” Bono told Lovato. “I figured out that I was trans almost 10 years before I transitioned and was terrified, absolutely terrified of it.”
A “kid of the ’70s,’ Bono didn’t have “YouTube or the internet,” but knew from an early age that there was something “totally different about me.”
“I knew I wished I was a boy. I knew I felt like a boy. I didn’t have a name for it,” he said. “When I was about 13, I started to identify my attraction to girls. I knew ‘gay’ and ‘lesbian’ so I thought that’s what this feeling is, and I tried to fit in that identity for about 30 years.”
Then, when he was at a party in the early 2000s with “a lot of lesbians,” a moment of clarity happened.
“I started to realize there’s one thing not proper right here,” he explained. “I keep in mind this explicit time pondering: ‘Huh, all of those ladies, regardless of how they current themselves — now I do know it is their gender expression, however we did not have these phrases then — whether or not they’re extra female or extra butch, all of them determine as ladies, all of them are blissful being ladies and I’m not.’”
He continued, “For a very long time I believed there was part of the lesbian group that felt like me, which was: I really feel like a person, I want I had been a person, I’m not, so I’ve to take care of it. At that celebration, I noticed that is not the definition of any form of lesbian. So if I’m not a lesbian, what am I? It was at that time the place I noticed possibly I’m trans.”
Though Bono says he was “sober for 5 years after I lastly transitioned,” the actor was still self-medicating his pain through substance abuse — a problem he shared with his girlfriend at the time.
A long-time “folks pleaser,” Bono shared that it was his time spent at Al-Anon, a assist group just like Alcoholics Anonymous that helps households of alcoholics by practising the Twelve Steps and giving encouragement, that gave him the push he wanted.
“Al-Anon is definitely the factor that helped me transition greater than the rest,” he said. “Finally, I obtained to a spot the place I did not care. I used to be able to lastly care for myself.”
At the time, Bono was in a relationship with “someone who saved relapsing.”
“As I used to be going by this, my girlfriend on the time, after we met, had been each sober a few 12 months after which she saved relapsing. At the time, it was very upsetting however it ended up being an unimaginable reward as a result of it obtained me to Al-Anon and what Al-Anon actually teaches you is tips on how to care for your self, at first, to care for your personal wants first.”
Bono said he experienced “a second of readability.”
“When it lastly hit me, I felt actually constructive about the entire thing and had little doubt. I began my transition,” he said.
While the actor is one of the most famous trans people in the world, he has little interest in playing trans roles.
“I think about myself a personality actor so I wish to play elements which are as far-off from me as potential,” he said. “My favourite stuff has been the stuff I did on American Horror Story. I really like taking part in dangerous guys. I really like horror. I really like darkish stuff. That’s what actually turns me on as an actor.”
Coincidentally, his love for acting was the very thing that introduced him to his current girlfriend, actress Shara Blue, who he first met while taking part in the Lee Strasberg Theatre & Film Institute in Los Angeles when they were teenagers.
In fact, his girlfriend was “the primary individual I ever kissed,” he confirmed.
“There are so many issues I can look again at my childhood and file within the ‘What were my parents thinking?’ class, however this one determination my mother did was the most effective factor she ever did,” he said.
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